


A Blade to Draw Blood

by Warriorsqueen



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: 5 Times, F/M, Reverse Chronology
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-20
Updated: 2015-12-20
Packaged: 2018-05-07 21:16:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5471045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Warriorsqueen/pseuds/Warriorsqueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A story told in reverse<br/>Sif's dagger and the story it tells<br/>Or, 5 times Sif projects her feelings about Loki on the dagger that was once his</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Blade to Draw Blood

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Araine](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Araine/gifts).



> So this a gift for Araine, and when I was stalking their tumblr I came across a post asking about Sif's dagger in a deleted scene that had clearly belonged to Loki. So basically, I just took that idea and ran. It's a few stories in reverse chronological order telling Sif's attachment to that dagger and its origins.  
> The first section actually takes place directly after Sif's second guest appearance on agents of shield but that's not really important for anything other than timeframe. If you don't watch agents of shield it's not at all important except for a bit more context (and I forgive you for not watching, but you should fix that immediately).  
> And for those who don't know, [this](http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lqvyhhAL5X1qlug1yo1_400.jpg) is the dagger that this story is about.

 

Sif fell to a kneel “My Lord, I have retrieved the kree soldier from Midgard and brought him back here to Asgard. He has lost his memories so.."

“That is acceptable Lady Sif."

Sif rose up, with her head still bowed in respect. The All-father had been cracking down a bit on tradition and respect recently.

“Lady Sif, I see that you no longer carry your dagger on you."

“My King, I do not understand. I carry many daggers on me. Even when I was disguised on Midgard, I kept a dagger on me."

Odin leaned forward in his throne. "I speak of a specific dagger. I speak of the curved blade you once carried on you at all times."

Sif fixed her eyes on the floor “I have not carried that dagger on me for a long time now, My Lord. It carries far too many memories and implications, so I chose to have it put away."

“And where is it now? It is very powerful weapon, and  it should not be gone forever."

“It is hidden my lord. I was afraid of the power it held, and I wish its curse on none."

“And what curse is that Lady Sif?"

“Loss."

\-----

Sif stared at the box sitting on the table in front of her. She gently touched the ornate lid, not daring to do much more. The green carvings glittered on the battered wood, mocking her.

She desperately tried not to scream, tears already falling down her face. Mourning was something that no person could find easy, and mourning someone thought to have already been dead was harder still. Realizing that he had come back to her as a villain but died as a hero was everything she hated that she had ever wished.

She had wished for Loki’s true homecoming ever since he had set foot on Asgard after his fall. She had prayed that he was not truly the monster Thor had said he was. And he had changed, done exactly as she had so hoped. But in doing so, he had died.

Sif’s fingers traced the engravings, following the gently curving lines as they twisted and swirled. Tears continued to fall down her face, staining the wood.

She thought only of Loki. Loki twice-loved. Loki twice-dead.

\-----

Sif entered her chambers, closing the door behind her with a near silent click. She moved quietly and slowly towards the display shelf. She plucked the unsuspecting wooden box from that shelf. The swirling details seemed to glow deeply with power.

Sif threw the box across the room, feeling a small sense satisfaction in the clattering of the wood and the heavy thump of its contents as it hit the floor. She quickly snatched the box back up, gripping it so tightly that the wood began to protest.

He was alive! Yes, he was a traitor to Asgard and had led an invasion of Midgard but he was alive.

Her hands moved to undo the the latch but paused. No, she still couldn’t. She couldn’t do it again.

She couldn’t carry his dagger with her. She couldn’t think about him every time she went into battle. 

She couldn’t fall in love with Loki all over again.

\-----

Sif gripped the dagger in her hands so hard that that the metal began to cut into her skin. Tears ran down her face and she wanted to scream.

She had held herself together up to this point. She had to. Loki was dead, but she couldn’t have reacted then. She had to be there to support Thor. That was where she was needed. She couldn’t take that focus from Thor, who feeling so much more than her.

But in her room, she could mourn. She could mourn what she had with Loki. She could mourn what could have been. She could mourn what they should have been. And there was so much more.

They could have been a family. Sif was a warrior through and through, but that did not mean she didn’t have some desire for a wedding. For someone to be hers and hers alone.

They could have been lovers. All they had was stolen moments and now she didn’t even have that.

\-----

“Hello?"

There had been a knock on the door of her chambers, and Sif was surprised to find Loki standing before her. The young prince had a smirk on his face like always, but there seemed to be a hint of nervousness present among his features. 

Sif rolled her eyes. “What do you want?"

“May I come in Lady Sif? I have something I would like to give you."

Sif smiled slightly as she moved to let him in. “Prince loki would like to enter my personal chambers? How very scandalous!” Loki scoffed but entered the room without further fuss.

Sif crossed her arms over her chest and raised an eyebrow.

Loki gave a small smile as he used his magic to conjure a wooden box out of thin air.

“I would like to present you with this, as a celebration of your new warrior status and as a gift welcoming you into your new residence within the palace walls."

Sif took the box from his hands, inspecting the intricate detail carved into it.

“I carved it myself in some of my free time.” Sif raised an eyebrow before turning her attention back to the box. 

She unlatched and raised the lid, gasping as the box’s contents were revealed.

Resting within the box was a hooked dagger with the handle twisting into points. Resting underneath the dagger was a short braid of golden hair.

“Is this..."

“Yes, that’s your hair and the blade that cut it. It felt it would be right that your hair belonged to you once again."

Sif’s hand went to her hair. Loki had cut her hair in her sleep as a prank, but that simple moment had been a catalyst to getting her to where she now was. She had mourned her golden hair, but her black hair helped to cement that she was not who she had been expected to be.

“I-“ Sif paused. She looked into Loki’s eyes and smiled warmly. “Thank you."

**Author's Note:**

> I hope it was clear, but the chronology is after agents of shield season 2 ep 12 ==> post Thor 2 ==> Post avengers/start of Thor 2 ==> End of Thor ==> When they were much younger  
> I know lots of the shippy stuff was a bit more implied than I was hoping, but I hope you like it!


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